Sathy Balamani

Balamani is our (ex) servant Maid.....A lean, but strong, medium statured , energetic femme in her mid forties, with three grown up kids....And she is so vain of how she is still maintaining her slim figure....She stops in the middle of her sweeping , straightens up and asks me ---with a capricious look in her eyes which belies the doubt in her question---whether she had put on any weight recently...When i say no, her face splits into a happy grin and with a satisfied "everybody says so" she resumes her sweeping....

She was with me from the day we arrived in our own new flat at Tarnaka---some seventeen years ago---till recently,when ,unable to stand her frequent french leaves, i regretfully terminated her services....Yes...That was the only problem with her...She "d keep you waiting, jumping like mad and tearing at your hair at least twice in a week with her absences from work..."why cant she intimate me beforehand?".i wail and chide my self for not adhering to the golden advice my late mother-in-law gave me.."Employ only either unmarried girls or older women",..she used to say.."they are relatively freer and do not skip work often as the women in child bearing and rearing age do".....yeah...golden words...and brilliant HR principle...

But to be fair to Balamani,she would never make you regret her once she chugs in through the threshold banging the doors ...You 'll be reminded of a steam engine...All speed and sound...Yeah, i even believe she lets out smoke through her ears...You can hoard a big basket of dirty dishes or a tubful of soiled clothes...Balamani is not one to be intimidated by such mere trifles...She will go through them with a vengeance and before you can say Jack Robinson, she is all done and gone...As my husband once remarked wryly,"you go take a pee and she is gone already"..like that lord"s test we lost to England..with a 42 all out...Just don"t look too closely at the dishes...anyway you would put them under tap again no?

As i said before,Balamani is an adoring mother of three kids...and brought them up single-handedly,...well....almost...since her husband was a lion...I mean, he is one fine fellow who chose to live life like a lion...Those of you who see N.G.C. channel know how a lion lives...He lazes around all day ,grooming, scratching, sleeping and is usually the first one to devour the food his lionesses hunt and offer at his feet...Only this one is no lion...a pussy cat, you could say...A timid, nervous man unsure of him self,..just happy to relinquish the reins to a more capable partner...She thinks he has psychic problems while on one or two times i have seen him, he struck me as quite a normal guy,..may be just a bit laid back in attitude...He is a tailor by vocation...actually managed to make it a vacation,for he worked only occasionally and obviously became the biggest woe of his wife....As the kids grew up into their most crucial formative years, his career graph went exactly inversely proportional...

It is not as if her husband ever drank or had other bad habits, Balamani used to confide in me as she snatched few moments rest between her afternoon chores...That was the time she could take a little breather as all the men are out of the house and she could indulge in a bit of gossip with the mistresses...She would burst into peals of laughter and admitted SHE was the one who took a drop every now and then..You see, ..when there are marriages, functions, and other ocassions...Here she becomes virtuous and promised she would drop the habit soon, as her kids are growing up and what would a daughter-in-law is going say?...I nod my head and remember how my father---who as i said earlier liked to have his evening drink---felt himself to be in sympathetic league with her, and never forgot to tip her every time he visited us and admonished her to save money.......to buy a quarter and not to go for cheaper iuml...

She would relax ,during those afternoons, sit back and outlaid her plans for future, not caring whether i listened to or not...She has a nephew at her husband"s place and declared that she would, marry her daughter off to him with two cents of land they owned there....After all that boy is studying engineering and is a good catch...When her sons come up and start earning, she is going to build a small house in the small plot she acquired some time back...

So.... i watched her all through these years as both my child and her"s grew up along....as she struggled ,skimped and saved to bring up three kids on the meagre wages she brought in,in an expensive city like Hyderabad.. In a way, i think it is even quite heartening to know that still people at all levels can survive in this city...She would preserve even the smallest amounts of leftovers and carried them home...Some how always made sure that her kids are dressed in good enough clothes...Took on odd jobs to add to her income..Invested in what she called as CHittis...(chitfunds i suppose) and by juggling things here and there managed to have gas stoves, grinders, t.v.even few gold trinkets which she brought in proudly , to her workplace to be inspected by her mistresses,...,put her daughter through the high school and computer cources...and managed to place her sons (they were no good in studies) in fairly good vocations...And most importantly,brought them up to be good, obedient kids...

And all this while, her husband remained just a spectator...His contribution to either the family kitty, or at least an assertive role in the house hold affairs was just nill or at the most a very feeble one...He sits at one corner of the house or goes out on pleasant walks around the locality ...I daresay Balamani must have been in the habit of giving him a dressing down now and then and berated him regularly... Why not?...Nobody would respect anyone who does not discharge his duties..It is not just a matter of money either ..For I have seen so many people,who though would not earn single paise got oodles of respect from family members...Perhaps it has got to do with how much one cares for his or her wards and how strong and assertive they are in character...

On the other hand,she spent a fair amount of her money on him whenever he fell ill or went away sulking ..He does that some time...goes off just like that...Then she and her eldest son go searching after him.......I remember how she fell into a heap crying and calling upon the gods to come to her rescue and find him...huh...don"t i know it?....She skipped work for three days once to go to warangal to find him and on return skipped another day to pay her vows at the Balkampet yellamma temple...:)

I watch and wonder at this state of circumstances........O.k..May be it IS blashemous to take Balamani"s name in the same breath with the great pathivrathas...But i can say surely that she could be called as a fraction of those great women who knew the meaning of love...For only love can make a man or woman to forgive and overlook faults in others and not anything else...no amount of brainwashing or tutoring can do that...